International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day

On Saturday, November 23, we marked a 5th lesser-known anniversary since Hunter’s death: International Survivors of Suicide Loss Day.  Who knew such a day existed? And how profound that one does.  Senator Harry Reid, who lost his dad to suicide, introduced a resolution in 1999 which led to this designation; it always falls on the Saturday prior to Thanksgiving, a challenging time for anyone who’s suffered the loss of a loved one. 

The day, intended to offer healing and support to those who “survive” in the wake of a loved one’s death by suicide, captures the unique challenges of this loss. Like the death of any loved one, it is felt equally during life’s “big” events and quotidian details and yet, a death by suicide is also, always, shrouded in mystery, and that mystery presents quite a hurdle to survivors. We’ve never participated in the day’s events – I’m not sure the children are even aware of the designation – but I don’t think that is the point.  The point is to honor the searing loss due to suicide and encourage a community of souls with whom one can “process” the loss – for some, that is with a partner, for others, a cloudless sky and for others still, service to those in need. 

Regardless of the day, we march on, steeped in wonderful memories of a great guy and moments of sadness, lightened by engagement with others or nature and bolstered by our work in service to others.  Life is beautiful and, amazingly, intense loss doesn’t change that, it magnifies it.